Friday, July 12, 2013

Songs I Don't Know by Heart

     Music has always played a large role in my life, although the kind of music I listen to has changed over the years.  I've went from Heavy Metal Hair Bands in high school to Frank Sinatra in my early 20s. I've always been a fan of the likes of Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings, and Willie Nelson, and I've even learned to accept children's music like The Wiggles, The Doodlebops, and my personal favorite: Laurie Berkner.  I really did not have much of a choice in liking the kids stuff, because if they want to go see "Dora the Musical", we end up going to see "Dora the Musical", and I end up humming "Isa take the Wheel" all day long.  These days I'm all over the map, and I normally end up listening to the music the kids like anyway, but I always seem to get the lyrics wrong.  I have discovered that this phenomena is not limited to song lyrics, and I remember very well being asked to say the blessing before a meal and getting the "God is Great" prayer incorrect.  It went something like, "God is Great, God is Good, thank you for the Food, Food, Food."  Lyrics or words are good though, because without them you've got Kenny G.
     I really began to be a fan of music with Grease, Mary Poppins, or Kiss, and the exact correct origin is up for debate.  Spoon Full of Sugar, Greased Lightning, and seeing the original make-up clad Kiss at 6 years old were all quite an influence.  Later on I did several "lip-syncing" performances of Grease that originated from my "Chris Travolta" days in Elementary School P.E. square dancing class, and this eventually led to the group, "Chris Perry and the Flames" which had a one-time performance in Mrs. King's class around 1983-84.  The playlist was limited to one song, "Centerfold" by the J. Geils Band.  This love of performing eventually led to the formation of a three-man Rock group called, "Phantom" that me and a couple of buddies put together in high school.  I was a singer/songwriter, but our biggest obstacle was a lack of musical knowledge, talent, or the ability to play any instruments.  I wrote several songs (More like words on paper, due to above mentioned lack of talent) like one called, "Skullcrusher."  This song contained the line, "The Skullcrusher comes out and then you die."  We were cutting edge and kind of a big deal.  Phantom had a cult following of at least half a dozen people, but we never really caught on, go figure.  My lack of musical success led me to the other way I knew how to attract girls, Football....but that's another story.
     Today's lyrics throw me quite a bit, and I just don't really understand most of them.  I've had many issues understanding lyrics.  Just the other day I thought a song was saying, "Britney" likes "Or- E - O - E--- Oreos", and this prompted Maddie to say, "I want some Oreos." from the backseat.  Jesse informed me that the song was "Scream and Shout" by some guy named William and Britney Spears.  While I'm glad to see that Britney has gotten her crap together, these folks can't really write lyrics.  This comes from a former songwriter, well word writer.  There's Justin Timberlake, who I actually like, and his "Pocket Full of Soap", and some guy singing about holding a Coelancanth.  The Coelancanth was a fish that they thought was extinct, but then some guy caught one.  I thought it was really a sweet ode to this presumed dead forever fish, but Jesse again corrected me.  The lyrics are actually, "Pocket full of soul" and "The Ceiling can't hold us" respectively.  I do try and keep up with the Popular Music today, but I feel a little out of place.  Where's some Motley Crue or RATT when you need it.
     Finally, I would like to mention a few misheard song lyrics that I or someone I know have gotten wrong over the years.  Like, "Excuse me while I Kiss this Guy" from the Jimi Hendrix classic Purple Haze which really says, "Kiss the sky."  Cheryl's favorite is, "The Ants are my friends, They're Blowin in the Wind" from Blowin' in the Wind by Bob Dylan which really says, "The Answer my friends."  Here are a few more:  The first lyrics are incorrect, followed by song title and correct lyrics
"Olive the other Reindeer"- Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer "All of the other Reindeer"
"The Girl with Colitis walks by"- Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds "The girl with Kaleidoscope eyes"
"He is a Woman"- Evil Woman "Evil Woman"
"Secret Asian Man" -Secret Agent Man - "Secret Agent Man"
"Take me Down to the Very Last City" -Paradise City- "Take me down to the Paradise City."
I could go on, but I think you've got the idea.  I won't even try and tell you what I thought they were saying in the songs, "Addicted to Love" and "Hollaback Girl", I try and keep this blog family friendly.
     Well I guess it's pretty clear that song lyrics can be hard to understand and sing correctly.  My children are not exempt from this either, and we've had our own lyrics to Bon Jovi's "Bad Medicine" called "Bad Madison."  Jesse has had his issues with Bon Jovi also, "Shoppin' my heart and you're too lame."  That's from "You Give Love a Bad Name" by the way, the "Shot through the heart, and You're to blame."  Well that just about does it, and I'm sorry for throwing Jesse and Maddie under the bus, and I'm sure Jesse is somewhere saying, "Why you gotta be so......Mean?"  He's been known to do that.